I have a disease, and the only prescription is more tumblr.

 

Tourist: Could you give us directions to Olive Garden?

New Yorker: No, but I could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant.

Tourist:

Tourist:

Tourist:

Tourist: I came here to have a good time and honestly I am feeling so attacked right now.

weird-bug:

did we ever find out…….what the hell was on joey’s head??

i guess i never really LOOKED at that photograph

awwww-cute:

Found two baby bats rolling on my deck this morning. I had never seen a baby bat before, thought maybe others hadn’t either

i need to know about the second baby bat as well

awwww-cute:

Found two baby bats rolling on my deck this morning. I had never seen a baby bat before, thought maybe others hadn’t either

i need to know about the second baby bat as well

suckmymara:

A group of muscular men stand with their arms linked to prevent people from entering a house.

It’s a baracade

is this a pun?

vilniusmilnius2:

How did I end up watching an hour long video of a girl giving her friend dreadlocks what time is it where am i

youngstero:

do you think nut companies whose nuts are given out on planes are highly respected in the nut community or are they like the losers

this question hit me hard

takeyourheaven:

chrispine-trees:

do people wear glasses during sex or is it just like you’re blind and everthing’s a surprise

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA i love this

I just made the most ungodly noise. if i weren’t so sleep deprived it might have sounded more like laughter

I just made the most ungodly noise. if i weren’t so sleep deprived it might have sounded more like laughter

(Source: timeforhaim)

FAQ: How am I so cool?

I used to have the Benny Hill theme song autoplay on my Myspace page and things just snowballed from there.